5 ms·

I'm engaged to an American and they seem to view a car as a right of passage into adulthood. They feel like the expense of a car, whatever it may be, is essenti

by err4nt 11y ago

I'm engaged to an American and they seem to view a car as a right of passage into adulthood. They feel like the expense of a car, whatever it may be, is essential. If five people go to a restaurant, it's probably in 4+ vehicles. The craziest thing to me was recently a twenty year old borrowed money to purchase a stick-drive car when she doesn't drive stick and already had a recent, usable car. Why? Now she's going to have no money for years to come!

phillc73 11y ago
> If five people go to a restaurant, it's probably in 4+ vehicles That's just crazy! It means five people can't drink. All that's needed is maximum one car for five people, maybe two if traveling from dispersed locations. Keep designated drivers to a minimum.
- kgwgk 11y ago
  Crazy indeed! Why would anyone want to go to a restaurant if not to drink alcohol?
- SerLava 11y ago
  >maybe two if traveling from dispersed locations. Remember this is America we're talking about. Locations are really, really dispersed. Carpooling 5 people could mean the driver is dropping people off for an hour and a half.
  - wolfgke 11y ago
    Or if the driver drives a pickup truck one could go by bicycle to a point that is along the way that the driver takes and just put the bicycle on the truck bed when meeting. For the other direction it's the same. This should reduce the problem.
    - mikeash 11y ago
      Drunk bicycling is still a bad idea, and illegal.
      - Doctor_Fegg 11y ago
        It is a bad idea, and it is illegal in some countries, but nonetheless if you cycle drunk you're more likely to injure/kill yourself; if you drive drunk you're more likely to injure/kill someone else.
        mikeash 11y ago
        I agree that it's better, but it's still a bad idea and shouldn't be presented as any sort of solution.
- organsnyder 11y ago
  When a major brewery in my town (Founders) relocated as they were expanding, they decided to move right across the street from the city's central transit station. Anyone (such as myself) that lives near a bus line can easily go to their taproom and not worry about driving. Not sure how much the transit station played into their relocation plans, or whether the land was just cheap, but it was a genius move.
atom-morgan 11y ago
Absolutely. At my first job out of college it was an immediate purchase for some even though they were already tens of thousands in debt. I'm hoping my car (since high school) lasts long enough that I never have to buy/own a car again.
- err4nt 11y ago
  Would you believe I'm coming up on thirty, and have never (yet) owned my own vehicle? It's not a big deal where I live, but to my fiancée's friends it counts against me. More than once, when talking about me, my fiancée has heard her friends tell others "He doesn't even have a car!" as though somehow I'm less of a man, and have to be driven around like a child. That whole mindset is foreign to me - I'm an adult which means I can afford to rent any vehicle I need to use, or hire somebody to drive me whenever I want and it's still probably cheaper than owning one vehicle in the long run.
  - peyton 11y ago
    Mid-20s American here. I'll try to explain my mindset. I've lived in Switzerland and all over Asia without owning a car. Loved public transit and never wanted a car. - Public transit in the US sometimes feels like riding a rolling homeless shelter. I know it's a chicken-and-egg thing, as most people have cars. I have no issue riding public transit in the US, but I couldn't see my parents taking public transit. So having a car is part of becoming like my parents. - Being able to drive a car (auto or stick) has practical advantages for emergencies. So there's a provider element. - Having a car is a symbol of independence. People who have cars in the US sometimes have friends asking to bum rides. So not have a car is seen as not being independent.
jghn 11y ago
I spent most of my 20s and all of my 30s not owning a car. Even living in a city where I don't need one if get a lot of responses to that fact stating that I'm an odd duck
- err4nt 11y ago
  I live in Toronto, and I'm still weird for not owning a car. What's funny is that when my fiancée is here she insists on driving places just to make use of the car. It's really a love story Americans have with their vehicles - making excuses to use them when it's not even necessary. Sometimes I humour her and ride along, but when it's really obvious that transit is the right choice I insist we do the sensible thing :)
marincounty 11y ago
I would love to rid myself of all the hassle of a vechicle. Ironically, a week ago I had a terrible time getting my vechicle to pass smog. I literally got to the point where I considered giving the vechicle up. I wasn't having a great time psychologically, and wasen't thinking like I usually do. I usually don't fret about a vehicle because I went to automotive school, and can work on most vechicles, but I was just having a bad week. That said, where I live, giving up my vechicle would be like just giving up in life. I need a car in the suburbs. I honestly don't know how people do without them, unless they live near good public transportation. And yes, I guess America is very vechicle centric, but for good reason. They built it so spread out. They built most of our infrastructure like the 50's would last forever. A home, and a car for every American. We would always buy American products. We would never have to live like the rest of the world?
- meric 11y ago
  >> I honestly don't know how people do without them I look for work and apartments within several minutes walk from a major train station. I can't imagine owning a car - the paperwork, regular checkups, constant looking for parking space, worrying about how to keep the car long term on a long trip overseas. Do I own the car, or does the car own me? When I have to travel somewhere inconvenient by public transportation I call a taxi or a Uber. I do this maybe once a month or two. If there's an event on a weekend and I could walk there in less than an hour from home, occasionally I'd walk instead of catching a taxi or Uber. I have visited a city with lacking public transport before, you're right, being unable to drive, and cannot travel anywhere without having to call a Uber every time, even to the corner shop few kilometres away, I feel like I'm trapped.
coroutines 11y ago
Something that's been frustrating for me is the bureaucracy around getting hired to government positions or school districts. I have a California State ID, which should serve well as identification - but I've been turned away by HR saying they require a drivers license several times. I'm pretty certain this is always incorrect when I apply for jobs that require no travel, but there's just so much policy you can't argue with. It's ridiculous. I also try to avoid telling employers I don't have a car, because I've been screened out of jobs by people assuming public transit is not reliable. Kinda frustrating. Btw, the US is huge. People here don't use enough caution when driving, but it would be impossible for most everyone to hold down a job without a car. Driving is a needed right when it shouldn't be.
- wolfgke 11y ago
  If there were a similar public outcry for the problem that you mention as for gender discrimination, it would soon nearly vanish.
  - sokoloff 11y ago
    Because gender discrimination has nearly vanished?
- err4nt 11y ago
  > it would be impossible for most everyone to hold down a job without a car I work internationally with a company of americans and the entire company is remote. Every single one of those Americans works from home, so would they still need cars? I know it's not the majority of people, but there's still a large chunk of people who can get to and from work without a car in the US as well.
  - coroutines 11y ago
    Are they taking applications? :p
yardie 11y ago
This is an assumption you make when growing up in suburbia. I assumed all adults knew how to drive and had a car. Or access to one. My college roommate, who was from NYC, didn't have a license and it kind of shocked me when he told me. He was very well organized on the public transit front. Like knowing exactly when to leave the dorm to catch the bus without having to stand out in the cold for more than 5 minutes. This is something I didn't master until moving to a city myself. Now that I've lived without a car for so long I'm not even sure I want another one. Buses, Uber, and rentals fill the void nicely.

by err4nt 11y ago

phillc73 11y ago

> If five people go to a restaurant, it's probably in 4+ vehicles That's just crazy! It means five people can't drink. All that's needed is maximum one car for five people, maybe two if traveling from dispersed locations. Keep designated drivers to a minimum.

kgwgk 11y ago
Crazy indeed! Why would anyone want to go to a restaurant if not to drink alcohol?
SerLava 11y ago
>maybe two if traveling from dispersed locations. Remember this is America we're talking about. Locations are really, really dispersed. Carpooling 5 people could mean the driver is dropping people off for an hour and a half.
- wolfgke 11y ago
  Or if the driver drives a pickup truck one could go by bicycle to a point that is along the way that the driver takes and just put the bicycle on the truck bed when meeting. For the other direction it's the same. This should reduce the problem.
  - mikeash 11y ago
    Drunk bicycling is still a bad idea, and illegal.
    - Doctor_Fegg 11y ago
      It is a bad idea, and it is illegal in some countries, but nonetheless if you cycle drunk you're more likely to injure/kill yourself; if you drive drunk you're more likely to injure/kill someone else.
      - mikeash 11y ago
        I agree that it's better, but it's still a bad idea and shouldn't be presented as any sort of solution.
organsnyder 11y ago
When a major brewery in my town (Founders) relocated as they were expanding, they decided to move right across the street from the city's central transit station. Anyone (such as myself) that lives near a bus line can easily go to their taproom and not worry about driving. Not sure how much the transit station played into their relocation plans, or whether the land was just cheap, but it was a genius move.

atom-morgan 11y ago

Absolutely. At my first job out of college it was an immediate purchase for some even though they were already tens of thousands in debt. I'm hoping my car (since high school) lasts long enough that I never have to buy/own a car again.

err4nt 11y ago
Would you believe I'm coming up on thirty, and have never (yet) owned my own vehicle? It's not a big deal where I live, but to my fiancée's friends it counts against me. More than once, when talking about me, my fiancée has heard her friends tell others "He doesn't even have a car!" as though somehow I'm less of a man, and have to be driven around like a child. That whole mindset is foreign to me - I'm an adult which means I can afford to rent any vehicle I need to use, or hire somebody to drive me whenever I want and it's still probably cheaper than owning one vehicle in the long run.
- peyton 11y ago
  Mid-20s American here. I'll try to explain my mindset. I've lived in Switzerland and all over Asia without owning a car. Loved public transit and never wanted a car. - Public transit in the US sometimes feels like riding a rolling homeless shelter. I know it's a chicken-and-egg thing, as most people have cars. I have no issue riding public transit in the US, but I couldn't see my parents taking public transit. So having a car is part of becoming like my parents. - Being able to drive a car (auto or stick) has practical advantages for emergencies. So there's a provider element. - Having a car is a symbol of independence. People who have cars in the US sometimes have friends asking to bum rides. So not have a car is seen as not being independent.

jghn 11y ago

I spent most of my 20s and all of my 30s not owning a car. Even living in a city where I don't need one if get a lot of responses to that fact stating that I'm an odd duck

err4nt 11y ago
I live in Toronto, and I'm still weird for not owning a car. What's funny is that when my fiancée is here she insists on driving places just to make use of the car. It's really a love story Americans have with their vehicles - making excuses to use them when it's not even necessary. Sometimes I humour her and ride along, but when it's really obvious that transit is the right choice I insist we do the sensible thing :)

marincounty 11y ago

I would love to rid myself of all the hassle of a vechicle. Ironically, a week ago I had a terrible time getting my vechicle to pass smog. I literally got to the point where I considered giving the vechicle up. I wasn't having a great time psychologically, and wasen't thinking like I usually do. I usually don't fret about a vehicle because I went to automotive school, and can work on most vechicles, but I was just having a bad week. That said, where I live, giving up my vechicle would be like just giving up in life. I need a car in the suburbs. I honestly don't know how people do without them, unless they live near good public transportation. And yes, I guess America is very vechicle centric, but for good reason. They built it so spread out. They built most of our infrastructure like the 50's would last forever. A home, and a car for every American. We would always buy American products. We would never have to live like the rest of the world?

meric 11y ago
>> I honestly don't know how people do without them I look for work and apartments within several minutes walk from a major train station. I can't imagine owning a car - the paperwork, regular checkups, constant looking for parking space, worrying about how to keep the car long term on a long trip overseas. Do I own the car, or does the car own me? When I have to travel somewhere inconvenient by public transportation I call a taxi or a Uber. I do this maybe once a month or two. If there's an event on a weekend and I could walk there in less than an hour from home, occasionally I'd walk instead of catching a taxi or Uber. I have visited a city with lacking public transport before, you're right, being unable to drive, and cannot travel anywhere without having to call a Uber every time, even to the corner shop few kilometres away, I feel like I'm trapped.

coroutines 11y ago

Something that's been frustrating for me is the bureaucracy around getting hired to government positions or school districts. I have a California State ID, which should serve well as identification - but I've been turned away by HR saying they require a drivers license several times. I'm pretty certain this is always incorrect when I apply for jobs that require no travel, but there's just so much policy you can't argue with. It's ridiculous. I also try to avoid telling employers I don't have a car, because I've been screened out of jobs by people assuming public transit is not reliable. Kinda frustrating. Btw, the US is huge. People here don't use enough caution when driving, but it would be impossible for most everyone to hold down a job without a car. Driving is a needed right when it shouldn't be.

wolfgke 11y ago
If there were a similar public outcry for the problem that you mention as for gender discrimination, it would soon nearly vanish.
- sokoloff 11y ago
  Because gender discrimination has nearly vanished?
err4nt 11y ago
> it would be impossible for most everyone to hold down a job without a car I work internationally with a company of americans and the entire company is remote. Every single one of those Americans works from home, so would they still need cars? I know it's not the majority of people, but there's still a large chunk of people who can get to and from work without a car in the US as well.
- coroutines 11y ago
  Are they taking applications? :p

yardie 11y ago

This is an assumption you make when growing up in suburbia. I assumed all adults knew how to drive and had a car. Or access to one. My college roommate, who was from NYC, didn't have a license and it kind of shocked me when he told me. He was very well organized on the public transit front. Like knowing exactly when to leave the dorm to catch the bus without having to stand out in the cold for more than 5 minutes. This is something I didn't master until moving to a city myself. Now that I've lived without a car for so long I'm not even sure I want another one. Buses, Uber, and rentals fill the void nicely.