4 ms·

I'm really struggling to see what the big deal is with a lot of these stories. It seems like either a) We're only getting half the story. b) There are clues

I'm really struggling to see what the big deal is with a lot of these stories. It seems like either a) We're only getting half the story. b) There are clues that poor communication was the issue. c) There is no story to begin with, just some perceived slight in the authors head.

jacobush 11y ago
Nicely put. I upvoted this story so I could see what you guys think in the comments. I read it and, and yeah, any combination of a) b) c). One clue that poor communication might have been an issue, is that you and I are left here standing feeling like we are missing out on something in the story. That is not good storytelling, AKA it is poor communication. Wu, more details! Maybe the "need to get a drink guy" was really ill and could barely stand up? For instance.
- LukeB_UK 11y ago
  There are many reasons why the "need to get a drink guy" could have done what what he did, for example poor social skills (not his fault) or being socially drained (as somewhat of an introvert, I experience this)
  - gwbas1c 11y ago
    Or the "need to get a drink" really meant that he didn't like working with Fred.
    - Shengbo 11y ago
      Or he needed to get a drink.
catmanjan 11y ago
Yep, a few of them just sound like interactions with people who are having a bad day...
fredwu 11y ago
Hi, Author here. Sorry you (and many others) felt that way... I was trying to put together these moments without rambling on too much. To offer my perspective on the things you mentioned: a) I absolutely agree, there's always two sides of a coin. I can only describe how I felt at the time. b) Again, I agree, and communication is a two way art. Having said that, some of those moments I feel there were very little I could do in my end to turn them around. c) I did not claim those to be stories either, my intention was to share these things that have happened to me in the past and made me felt uneasy at the time, and perhaps make more people (including myself) to be more aware of their surroundings...
crispyambulance 11y ago
I think the OP would feel better writing a blog post of gratitude: the same number of vignettes, except that they're stories were coworkers were extraordinarily kind or generous. The way other people behave is often a reaction to how they perceive they're being treated. Perhaps the OP should introspect on how he appears to other?
- fredwu 11y ago
  Thank you, that inspired me to think about writing another "moments" piece for the kind ones. :) In recent years I have started gathering feedback for myself from my peers, direct reports and managers. The issue I find is that only certain type of people are willing to be completely honest, for the rest it really depends on how much rapport you were able to build with them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I try, but it's hard. :P
  - jacobush 11y ago
    So most people are normal. :). Some are thick skinned, or confident, or just socially oblivious and will just tell their mind. Complete honesty is a dangerous thing. It's like walking nude.

jacobush 11y ago

Nicely put. I upvoted this story so I could see what you guys think in the comments. I read it and, and yeah, any combination of a) b) c). One clue that poor communication might have been an issue, is that you and I are left here standing feeling like we are missing out on something in the story. That is not good storytelling, AKA it is poor communication. Wu, more details! Maybe the "need to get a drink guy" was really ill and could barely stand up? For instance.

LukeB_UK 11y ago
There are many reasons why the "need to get a drink guy" could have done what what he did, for example poor social skills (not his fault) or being socially drained (as somewhat of an introvert, I experience this)
- gwbas1c 11y ago
  Or the "need to get a drink" really meant that he didn't like working with Fred.
  - Shengbo 11y ago
    Or he needed to get a drink.

catmanjan 11y ago

Yep, a few of them just sound like interactions with people who are having a bad day...

fredwu 11y ago

Hi, Author here. Sorry you (and many others) felt that way... I was trying to put together these moments without rambling on too much. To offer my perspective on the things you mentioned: a) I absolutely agree, there's always two sides of a coin. I can only describe how I felt at the time. b) Again, I agree, and communication is a two way art. Having said that, some of those moments I feel there were very little I could do in my end to turn them around. c) I did not claim those to be stories either, my intention was to share these things that have happened to me in the past and made me felt uneasy at the time, and perhaps make more people (including myself) to be more aware of their surroundings...

crispyambulance 11y ago

I think the OP would feel better writing a blog post of gratitude: the same number of vignettes, except that they're stories were coworkers were extraordinarily kind or generous. The way other people behave is often a reaction to how they perceive they're being treated. Perhaps the OP should introspect on how he appears to other?

fredwu 11y ago
Thank you, that inspired me to think about writing another "moments" piece for the kind ones. :) In recent years I have started gathering feedback for myself from my peers, direct reports and managers. The issue I find is that only certain type of people are willing to be completely honest, for the rest it really depends on how much rapport you were able to build with them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I try, but it's hard. :P
- jacobush 11y ago
  So most people are normal. :). Some are thick skinned, or confident, or just socially oblivious and will just tell their mind. Complete honesty is a dangerous thing. It's like walking nude.