3 ms·
Ask HN: How does a 24-year-old guy work on his interpersonal skills?
I am generally out of the topics when I am talking with some person and when we two are the only people conversating. It doesn't happen much when more people are there in the group.
This is more observant when I trying to have a conversation (both- face to face and on text) with some girl and/or not conversating in my native language.
I can point it to my social awkwardness, not-knowing-how-to-talk-to-other-gender among other things.
So, how do I make things better?
- clishem 11y agoRead the classic book by Dale Carnegie: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_to_Win_Friends_and_Influence_People https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_to_Win_Friends_and_Influ... Also, it's up to you but I wouldn't take social advice from random people on HN. ;-)
- aryamaan 11y agoWhy not? and what else are good places to take social advice from?
- noir_lord 11y agoPractice. Engage people in conversation you might not otherwise, if you are in a coffee shop and it's not busy make a comment about something in the news to the person behind the counter etc. Striking up a conversation with a stranger has the advantage of there is little pressure (if it goes badly you probably won't see them again) and allows you to talk to lots of people with diverse interests. Rather than worry about what you are going to say really listen to what they say and then ask questions, people love to talk about themselves and generally like answering questions about something they are interested in, a large part of conversation is been a really good listener which doesn't just mean not saying anything but really listening and then saying something pertinent. As for conversation topics, follow the news (and read news sources that you might not read by default) as that gives you a varied base of reference plus as I'm English you always have the universal fallback of talking about the weather.