Let me add a bit more then. It doesn't matter why you're closing yourself off. You start wondering about the why, you'll set out on the path of trying to figu

Let me add a bit more then. It doesn't matter why you're closing yourself off. You start wondering about the why, you'll set out on the path of trying to figure out what people are thinking ... and let me skip to to the end, that path is a dead end. People feel and think things that are based on their experience, but you have no idea what the totality of that experience is. You mention you like jazz. The other person crosses their arms because they stubbed their toe in the morning and jazz was playing in the background, now they remember their toe hurts and they're feeling shitty. How can you possibly foresee that? That sort of random stuff comes up in conversation all the time. The proper response isn't to try to mind read or to convince them that jazz is wonderful. It's to talk about something else.