3 ms·
> Your boss doesn't punch you for not filing your TPS reports; your spouse doesn't hit you for not doing the shopping. You're right, but he also has a point in
by over 11y ago
> Your boss doesn't punch you for not filing your TPS reports; your spouse doesn't hit you for not doing the shopping.
You're right, but he also has a point in that eventually, if you just don't do things, the cops will drag you away. Eventual violence is a cornerstone of order in our society. I find this unpalatable, but at least another cornerstone of order is motivation to do good things.
Just as short timeouts are not solitary confinement, open-handed slaps on the butt are not gang beatings. It's generally the parent that determines whether the punishment is abusive, not the type of punishment itself.
- DanBC 11y ago> open-handed slaps on the butt are not gang beatings. It's generally the parent that determines whether the punishment is abusive, not the type of punishment itself. No, this is criminal in many countries and any parent who hits a child is incompetent. Hitting a child is unambiguously abusive in many countries, because we see that the parent lacks skill.
- over 11y agoWell, I disagree I guess. (Yes, it's criminal in ~50 countries.) In general I believe there's a middle ground to be found on just about any issue, and that given enough perspective there are pros and cons to any situation. More than anything else, the practice of seeking this middle ground has helped me to deal with the effects of growing up in an abusive environment.