3 ms·

I've had really good bosses, but every time a one-on-one comes up, I get nervous. I've been laid off in one-on-one meetings in the past. I've also had to make s

I've had really good bosses, but every time a one-on-one comes up, I get nervous. I've been laid off in one-on-one meetings in the past. I've also had to make split decisions without properly evalutating it, like tell my manager who to lay off, before. I'm also not perfect, so every time one of those meetings comes up I start wondering if something I did that wasn't perfect is going to come up and I'm about to get a stern talking to, even though more often than not the one-on-ones go well. If I really had a problem that I wanted a resolution on, I'd knock on my managers door and talk to him when I was ready to talk to him about it. I usually don't bring those things up in one-on-ones, so they haven't been terribly useful to me. So generally, I get really nervous before the meeting, and relax again afterwards. I don't know if I'd get rid of them entirely, but I wish they were less frequent.

manyxcxi 11y ago
If they're a normally scheduled meeting it seems odd that you would be so anxious about them. I could totally see the anxiety if they weren't part of a routine, where if one suddenly popped up you'd be wondering what it could mean. But if you always had a meeting on the books every week or couple of weeks, it would seem like it would just be a normal run of the mill check in. Then again, if you weren't working with your boss that frequently or your one on ones were generally most of the relationship you had with them, I could see how they'd cause anxiety. Hopefully you are able to find a cadence with them, or a boss, that eases the anxiety and provides you with connection and value.