I once proposed that the way to express one's attraction to a person was to treat the person nicely, e.g., holding a door for them. My interlocutor responded "

I once proposed that the way to express one's attraction to a person was to treat the person nicely, e.g., holding a door for them. My interlocutor responded "So, flirt with them." I suddenly had no idea was "flirting" was. I thought flirting meant actions intended to propose amorous activity (American Heritage Dictionary: "To amuse oneself in playful amorousness; play lightly or mockingly at courtship"), and my sincere intent had been to remove that element. Had I been flirting all these years? Is it impossible not to flirt, while treating people in a warm manner?