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What Keeps Couples Happy Long Term
- xutopia 11y agoHow do we get passed this paywall?
- dalke 11y agoCopy&paste "What Keeps Couples Happy Long Term" into your search engine of choice. Follow link from there.
- maxerickson 11y agoThe 'web' link up under the story title is a link to a Google search for the headline. I still get asked to sign in when coming from Google though. I guess the way to read the article is to sign up/subscribe.
- dalke 11y agoPerhaps there's a cookie? I opened mine in privacy mode. Also, I use DDG instead of Google.
- aaronbrager 11y agoGoogle the headline in incognito / private browsing mode.
- emodendroket 11y agoI still get the paywall message.
- adamqureshi 11y agoWorks! also safari in private mode, will get you in.
- ChrisGranger 11y agoSending a forged referrer header of https://www.google.com https://www.google.com seems to work. I'm using the RefControl add-on for Firefox but I imagine there are other options...
- Qiasfah 11y agoClick on the "web" link under the header from the HN Comments page (this pulls up a google search for the title).
- fideloper 11y agoWho cares? The reduction of "happiness in marriage" to the single factor of sex is narrow-minded and frankly...weird. An article about sex and marriage getting voted to the top of Hacker News isn't really lending the article any credit ether.
- emodendroket 11y agoHow would I know what it says when I can't read it.
- ryandvm 11y agoUh... you could pay. Seriously. What is so objectionable about respecting their proposal for viewing the content they produced? You don't want to agree? Don't read it. I have a feeling that if your question was, "how can I subvert this project's open source license?", you would be flamed into oblivion. I'm not sure why a request to violate the WSJ's implicit license agreement is not similarly received...
- xutopia 11y agoDo they actually remove ads if I pay?
- Diederich 11y agoWork. My relationship with my wife is the most important project in my life, period. I work hard on important projects. So does my wife. We sit down and communicate about an hour, most every day. For years, we asked each other these six questions, and listened to the response: 1. What's the worst thing that happened to you today? 2. What's the best thing that happened to you today? 3. What's the most surprising thing that happened to you today? 4. What's the most interesting thing that happened to you today? 5. What's the worst thing you did today? 6. What's the best thing you did today?
- Someone1234 11y agoHow uhh structured. I'm all about good communication but asking those exact six questions every evening would get old fast. Do the two of you have so little in common that all you have to talk about is your monotonous work day? There is something to be said for having shared hobbies in a relationship (yes, also individual hobbies) if only to give you something to talk about. We talk politics extensively for one example.
- deleted 11y ago[deleted]
- JoeAltmaier 11y agoOr, just understand that those are the standard topics and begin conversing. Nobody needs to tick boxes on a form.
- Diederich 11y agoRight. In the beginning, for the first few years, it did approach 'tick boxes on a form' from time to time. Note, though, that each partner is free to answer each question in any way they want to. Sometimes, it was "Uh, nothing surprising. What I really want to talk about is...." Some ceremony led to highly consistent, timely communication. The latter is the goal, the former is just a tool.
- jchendy 11y ago
- toyg 11y agoLol. Couples having more/better sex are happier and communicate more; and they likely have more/better sex because they communicate more and are happier. Great analysis there. I'm really waiting for the next study on what keeps water so wet.
- infinite8s 11y agoActually scientists aren't really sure what makes water 'wet' :) (at least from a molecular perspective)
- scott_s 11y agoThis kind of dismissive thinking is counter-productive. Our intuitions are often wrong, and hindsight-bias allow us to fool ourselves that our intuition would have been right when we already know the answer. In order to figure out what is actually happening, we need to do studies and experiments rather than just thinking about it, to find out where our intuitions are wrong. When our intuition happens to match the outcome, that is not failure, nor is it a reason to mock the people who did the work. They are advancing our understanding.
- toyg 11y agoMy point is that this sort of studies has been done over and over again, and they repeat the same results pretty much all the time. Have you ever heard anyone say that a good relationship is due to partners not talking and not having sex? Ever since the myth of the "obedient and silent wife" was dispelled in the '60s and '70s, it looks to me as intuition and research in this particular field overlapped fairly consistently. The interesting question would now be "why do people not do this already, even when rational and well-educated?". That would be noteworthy. I don't know, maybe the point of this research was getting down to the details (which they do, a bit), but the overall structure is the same as always.
- infinite8s 11y agoThe answer to "why do people not do this already, even when rational and well-educated?" is likely because in most families both parents have to work, and are probably tired at the end of the day. Relationships take work and it's sometimes easy to slip into a routine where you let the relationship just coast (especially once you have young children and any free time you used to have is out the window).
- noffy 11y agoFox news has a mirror http://www.foxnews.com/health/2016/02/09/what-keeps-couples-happy-long-term.html http://www.foxnews.com/health/2016/02/09/what-keeps-couples-...
- Spooky23 11y agoProTips: Don't be a dick. Listen. Talk.
- a_shiri 11y agoWhat Keeps Couples Happy are love, Loyalty and forgiveness
- adamqureshi 11y agoThe secret to a happy wife / life. Keep laughing everyday! its our secret sauce. Don't be so serious. Do new stuff. Make sure you tell your wife you LOVE her as much AS possible. Good Lucky!
- cylinder 11y agoYour wife will be quite serious if there's financial strain on the family, or other stressors. And laughing about it will just make you look like an aloof idiot.
- mchahn 11y agoMy wife and I have been happily married for 40 years and we attribute our success to negotiations. We recognize that we don't always want the same things and we make deals. I know this sounds cold but it reduces our tension to near zero and really works for us.