I think the answer is you don't get to choose. You cannot choose whether someone thinks of you as an enemy or not. You can choose whether you think of someone

I think the answer is you don't get to choose. You cannot choose whether someone thinks of you as an enemy or not. You can choose whether you think of someone as an enemy but not the other way around. I would also say the more introspective you are, and the more you can see other peoples point of view means the less likelihood you will ever call someone your enemy even if they have done you harm at one point. Is it normal? I think it is normal that if you stand up for anything there will be someone on the other side of the argument standing up just as hard the opposite way. Does this mean they are your enemy? Not in my opinion, but some might characterize it that way. If you make the burden a little less aggressive like you mentioned and say "intense dislike", versus enemy, then I think the number and likelihood goes up considerably, but again the introspective person likely has considerably less people they would intensely dislike. And in general, with time most "enemies" become less so unless they continue to do you harm or cause you pain. e.g. most of the time you might intensively dislike your ex-wife/husband and it may even go on for a year or a little more, but every month or so it gets a little less etc. The times when it doesn't are usually because the pain is continuing, e.g. you don't cut things off, someone lets a debt go into credit ruining territory 6 months later etc.