7 ms·

The problem is that often you might not be entirely sure about what's going on. In her case, the kiss in the cheek might just be cultural confusion (in Spanish-

The problem is that often you might not be entirely sure about what's going on. In her case, the kiss in the cheek might just be cultural confusion (in Spanish-speaking countries we do that even with strangers). Of course, after the lap thing... I don't even have words... How can you treat other people like that.. you are put in a position of power/responsibility and they use it to degrade others..

wavefunction 11y ago
Well this was in the US, where people do not kiss colleagues on the cheek. I know your intentions are fair in mentioning this cultural practice but that sort of justification also presents a fair amount of minimization of obvious harassment. I mean, do you kiss everyone on the cheek in Spanish-speaking countries or just very close friends?
- kentrado 11y ago
  EVERYONE. In Spain they do it twice. Cause they are gangsters.
  - hrbrtglm 11y ago
    In France, it depends where you live, in some area people do it up to 4-5 times. It can be quite disturbing, even for a french :)
    - wdmeldon 11y ago
      Is that the French version of an awkwardly long handshake?
  - SeoxyS 11y ago
    I'm Swiss, we do it three times.
- yulaow 11y ago
  Also in Italy, everyone. It is just the standard way to present yourself and/or say goodbye. I would also say I am more prone to do it with those people I don't know at all or very well than with my close friends.
- y04nn 11y ago
  I live in France, and it is natural to kiss on the cheek. Recently I was in UK and without even thinking about it I kissed a girl on the cheek to welcome her. After it happened I just realized what was going on. The thing is that it takes some time to reframe your behavior. But I have also been away several months and then it was feeling weird for me to kiss a girl on the cheek.
  - Mandatum 11y ago
    Recently had a French colleague do this to me in New Zealand. Was nothing short of hilarious. I made a warning sign for his desk.
- jacquesm 11y ago
  In France it can even include the men kissing the men and nobody thinks anything of it. Cultures really differ a lot in this respect.
- Joeboy 11y ago
  I live in multicultural London, and have no idea how to conduct myself in public.
  - dogma1138 11y ago
    Simple don't make eye contact with anyone who you weren't officially introduced too and only talk about the weather unless it's rugby season.
y04nn 11y ago
I feel like she is lacking self confidence, personality. Is she living in a fantasy world where everybody is kind? I was not here, so I don't want to juge, but she has only been asked to sit on ones lap, she could have strongly refuse and asked why she would do that in the first place. She should have shown strong signs of rejection, express the fact that is make her uncomfortable and asked him to stop. If he does not stop, them it is appropriate to report the behavior. But I don't call this has "sexual harassment", but more has sexual interest.
- plasticxme 11y ago
  What!? First, it is highly inappropriate for anyone in any leadership or management position to ask anyone to sit on there lap, no matter what their relationship status. Secondly, making any kind of sexual proposition or advance in the office on someone you are not in a relationship with is sexual harassment. If you are in a relationship, it's inappropriate and a conflict of interest.
  - yodsanklai 11y ago
    > Secondly, making any kind of sexual proposition or advance in the office on someone you are not in a relationship with is sexual harassment Actually, I believe it's not. Only if the proposition is unwelcome it is unlawful. So if this guy hasn't been fired, it's likely that the investigation concluded it wasn't a case of sexual harassment.
  - jacquesm 11y ago
    I wouldn't limit that to just people in any leadership or management position, that's just a aggravating circumstance.
  - Joeboy 11y ago
    > making any kind of sexual proposition or advance in the office on someone you are not in a relationship with is sexual harassment. Apparently around 20% of marriages begin with this kind of sexual harassment.
- skj 11y ago
gotchange 11y ago
You mean a real kiss on the cheek not a symbolic one where people place their cheeks side by side and just make funny sounds resembling a kiss? Because here we're used to the symbolic ones for close friends and reserve those smooches for intimate or romantic relationships.

wavefunction 11y ago

Well this was in the US, where people do not kiss colleagues on the cheek. I know your intentions are fair in mentioning this cultural practice but that sort of justification also presents a fair amount of minimization of obvious harassment. I mean, do you kiss everyone on the cheek in Spanish-speaking countries or just very close friends?

kentrado 11y ago
EVERYONE. In Spain they do it twice. Cause they are gangsters.
- hrbrtglm 11y ago
  In France, it depends where you live, in some area people do it up to 4-5 times. It can be quite disturbing, even for a french :)
  - wdmeldon 11y ago
    Is that the French version of an awkwardly long handshake?
- SeoxyS 11y ago
  I'm Swiss, we do it three times.
yulaow 11y ago
Also in Italy, everyone. It is just the standard way to present yourself and/or say goodbye. I would also say I am more prone to do it with those people I don't know at all or very well than with my close friends.
y04nn 11y ago
I live in France, and it is natural to kiss on the cheek. Recently I was in UK and without even thinking about it I kissed a girl on the cheek to welcome her. After it happened I just realized what was going on. The thing is that it takes some time to reframe your behavior. But I have also been away several months and then it was feeling weird for me to kiss a girl on the cheek.
- Mandatum 11y ago
  Recently had a French colleague do this to me in New Zealand. Was nothing short of hilarious. I made a warning sign for his desk.
jacquesm 11y ago
In France it can even include the men kissing the men and nobody thinks anything of it. Cultures really differ a lot in this respect.
Joeboy 11y ago
I live in multicultural London, and have no idea how to conduct myself in public.
- dogma1138 11y ago
  Simple don't make eye contact with anyone who you weren't officially introduced too and only talk about the weather unless it's rugby season.

y04nn 11y ago

I feel like she is lacking self confidence, personality. Is she living in a fantasy world where everybody is kind? I was not here, so I don't want to juge, but she has only been asked to sit on ones lap, she could have strongly refuse and asked why she would do that in the first place. She should have shown strong signs of rejection, express the fact that is make her uncomfortable and asked him to stop. If he does not stop, them it is appropriate to report the behavior. But I don't call this has "sexual harassment", but more has sexual interest.

plasticxme 11y ago
What!? First, it is highly inappropriate for anyone in any leadership or management position to ask anyone to sit on there lap, no matter what their relationship status. Secondly, making any kind of sexual proposition or advance in the office on someone you are not in a relationship with is sexual harassment. If you are in a relationship, it's inappropriate and a conflict of interest.
- yodsanklai 11y ago
  > Secondly, making any kind of sexual proposition or advance in the office on someone you are not in a relationship with is sexual harassment Actually, I believe it's not. Only if the proposition is unwelcome it is unlawful. So if this guy hasn't been fired, it's likely that the investigation concluded it wasn't a case of sexual harassment.
- jacquesm 11y ago
  I wouldn't limit that to just people in any leadership or management position, that's just a aggravating circumstance.
- Joeboy 11y ago
  > making any kind of sexual proposition or advance in the office on someone you are not in a relationship with is sexual harassment. Apparently around 20% of marriages begin with this kind of sexual harassment.
skj 11y ago

gotchange 11y ago

You mean a real kiss on the cheek not a symbolic one where people place their cheeks side by side and just make funny sounds resembling a kiss? Because here we're used to the symbolic ones for close friends and reserve those smooches for intimate or romantic relationships.