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I've played around with dating apps, but never found one that was even close to being useful. Finding someone you want to be around is such a complicated thing

I've played around with dating apps, but never found one that was even close to being useful. Finding someone you want to be around is such a complicated thing. Speaking as a dude, what these dating apps all get wrong is I don't want someone like myself. Yea, I verbalized I want this quality, and this, but in the end; I really don't know what I want. People change. People are not their profile. The long term relationships, I had, were with people who were my exact opposites. People I thought I would have nothing in common with. When I walk into a room, I just know who I'm drawn to. It has nothing to do with looks. It's just feeling I get. I don't think an app will ever replace this evolutionary mechanism. Plus, some people just photograph horridly. I'm a Photographer, and there's people who photograph well, and there's people that don't. If I'm doing a free photo shoot, and the model is only going to pay for sent head shots. I always ask for a candid picture of the future client before I shoot them. Before I waste a day shooting them, I want to see if they have a chance in hell of getting a job in the future. (I make money off the sent head shots. Free studio time, but they don't get the negatives/RAW files.) Some beautiful people in person--just photograph horridly.

tacon 11y ago
>The long term relationships, I had, were with people who were my exact opposites. People I thought I would have nothing in common with. You are an outlier as far as research on attraction. Studies show that people are attracted to very similar people on all dimensions, except for the opposite sex. Maybe there needs to be "The Opposite" dating app: George Costanza Does The Opposite https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKUvKE3bQlY https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKUvKE3bQlY
nathan_f77 11y ago
> I don't think an app will ever replace this evolutionary mechanism. I don't know, we could probably get pretty close with machine learning and enough data.
ThrustVectoring 11y ago
The point isn't to put a huge amount of investment into finding someone - that's dating's job. The point is to quickly and efficiently schedule things that have a better chance of going well. There's an additional knock-on effect from being able to treat the dates lightly: if you're not a good match, you've lost something like ten minutes of scheduling and a half hour of date prep.

tacon 11y ago

>The long term relationships, I had, were with people who were my exact opposites. People I thought I would have nothing in common with. You are an outlier as far as research on attraction. Studies show that people are attracted to very similar people on all dimensions, except for the opposite sex. Maybe there needs to be "The Opposite" dating app: George Costanza Does The Opposite https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKUvKE3bQlY https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKUvKE3bQlY

nathan_f77 11y ago

> I don't think an app will ever replace this evolutionary mechanism. I don't know, we could probably get pretty close with machine learning and enough data.

ThrustVectoring 11y ago

The point isn't to put a huge amount of investment into finding someone - that's dating's job. The point is to quickly and efficiently schedule things that have a better chance of going well. There's an additional knock-on effect from being able to treat the dates lightly: if you're not a good match, you've lost something like ten minutes of scheduling and a half hour of date prep.