4 ms·

I've often felt a bit abnormal for doing this. I guess I only ever see each person in one mode, so I had no idea if other people do it or not. Nice to know at l

I've often felt a bit abnormal for doing this. I guess I only ever see each person in one mode, so I had no idea if other people do it or not. Nice to know at least some other people do.

JohnBooty 11y ago
Yeah, totally normal, I think. I think that's just basic social mammal stuff - you calibrate your actions to your social surroundings. I mean even our dog has totally separate personalities when he's around us at home versus how he acts around other dogs. And it's not even the same personality for each of the other dogs - some dogs have calming effects on him, some make him hyperactive.
- 6stringmerc 11y ago
  In the way you responded and described your experience, I think the term I should've included, at least from an academic basis, is that of "code switching" because it's a pretty interesting concept to me. The big key was the 'work' versus 'home' concept of self. It's totally reasonable to want to compartmentalize, I think it's pretty ingrained in our species, so talking about it as a fact of life is pretty useful.
  - JohnBooty 11y ago
    Ah, ok, so there is a term for it! It's also something that's been much remarked-upon by various minority groups. I've heard a lot of African-American comedians, friends, and commentators mention how they have feel the need "act white" when they're not around other black people. You hear the exact same thing from LGBT folks as well - they often choose to "act straight" by default in a lot of environments. I've seen this a lot firsthand myself. It's also a good reminder that having the option to code switch is a real privilege. For some people it's not a coping skill, it's a literal survival tactic.
    - 6stringmerc 11y ago
      Yep! You really did summarize a great deal of the concept, and particularly well with the groups which seem to have the most frequent need (desire?) to utilize code switching. I've got several different modes based on personal or professional situations (definitely privilege), and I think it really started to click as a 'tool' about the time I got fluent in French language and culture. Very eye opening, and has been useful when getting to know and be collegiate with folks from minority or disenfranchised backgrounds.
- noobermin 11y ago
  I think the thing is in reality, there is no "true self" or "true identity" but there might be layers of identity that turn on or off depending on the situation. It's not like your persona mode is fake or anything. The only real sting is when a persona is based on lies or contradicts a larger part of your personality is when you get into trouble.

I've often felt a bit abnormal for doing this. I guess I only ever see each person in one mode, so I had no idea if other people do it or not. Nice to know at least some other people do.

JohnBooty 11y ago

Yeah, totally normal, I think. I think that's just basic social mammal stuff - you calibrate your actions to your social surroundings. I mean even our dog has totally separate personalities when he's around us at home versus how he acts around other dogs. And it's not even the same personality for each of the other dogs - some dogs have calming effects on him, some make him hyperactive.

6stringmerc 11y ago
In the way you responded and described your experience, I think the term I should've included, at least from an academic basis, is that of "code switching" because it's a pretty interesting concept to me. The big key was the 'work' versus 'home' concept of self. It's totally reasonable to want to compartmentalize, I think it's pretty ingrained in our species, so talking about it as a fact of life is pretty useful.
- JohnBooty 11y ago
  Ah, ok, so there is a term for it! It's also something that's been much remarked-upon by various minority groups. I've heard a lot of African-American comedians, friends, and commentators mention how they have feel the need "act white" when they're not around other black people. You hear the exact same thing from LGBT folks as well - they often choose to "act straight" by default in a lot of environments. I've seen this a lot firsthand myself. It's also a good reminder that having the option to code switch is a real privilege. For some people it's not a coping skill, it's a literal survival tactic.
  - 6stringmerc 11y ago
    Yep! You really did summarize a great deal of the concept, and particularly well with the groups which seem to have the most frequent need (desire?) to utilize code switching. I've got several different modes based on personal or professional situations (definitely privilege), and I think it really started to click as a 'tool' about the time I got fluent in French language and culture. Very eye opening, and has been useful when getting to know and be collegiate with folks from minority or disenfranchised backgrounds.
noobermin 11y ago
I think the thing is in reality, there is no "true self" or "true identity" but there might be layers of identity that turn on or off depending on the situation. It's not like your persona mode is fake or anything. The only real sting is when a persona is based on lies or contradicts a larger part of your personality is when you get into trouble.