4 ms·

Why should I have to explain why I accidentally called someone by the name they went by for 65 years. It's not a contradictory view. It's a slip up. My response

by cglace 11y ago

Why should I have to explain why I accidentally called someone by the name they went by for 65 years. It's not a contradictory view. It's a slip up. My response was literally a 5 second google search, went with the name in the title, and posted. No malice, no motives, just a mistake. Stop reading so far into it. The way you worded your response was basically, "If it was an error why are you a bigot?"

tangled_zans 11y ago
Hmm, you are right, I read into it a bit too much. Like I said, I felt insulted by you labelling my off-hand comment as "outrage", especially after you agreed that I was factually correct. In hindsight I can see why you took offence to my original comment, but there is a massive difference in connotation between saying "I am offended" and "you are outraged". [0] As I am a big proponent of free speech online, your implication of what I should and should not be able to say has been quite vexing to me, hence my annoyance. But I shouldn't have conflated that with whatever your views on trans women are. [0] http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2164 http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2164
- garrettgrimsley 11y ago
  >As I am a big proponent of free speech online, your implication of what I should and should not be able to say has been quite vexing to me, hence my annoyance. See >Stop reading so far into it. and >Be civil. [0] [0] https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html
  - tangled_zans 11y ago
    Yes I think I've already reached an understanding with the OP, but thanks for chiming in.
    - garrettgrimsley 11y ago
      You're welcome! One last thing, I noticed that you referred to OP using a gendered pronoun. Given that women (and other genders too!) are allowed to use the Internet in many countries [0] it is best to not gender pseudo-anonymous entities who have not explicitly signaled their gender or preferred pronouns. Unlike in Portuguese, Spanish, or whatever your native tongue may be, in English there are gender-neutral pronouns available. Two possible alternatives are singular they [1] or the Spivak pronoun e [2]. Defaulting to masculine pronouns as you did creates an environment that is unwelcoming and hostile for some, so to foster a welcoming space for all you should default to gender-neutral language. Overall your English is pretty good, keep practicing! Just wanted to clear that up, and thanks again! [0] https://www.itu.int/net/wsis/docs/geneva/official/dop.html https://www.itu.int/net/wsis/docs/geneva/official/dop.html [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singular_they https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singular_they [2] https://books.google.com/books?id=SK3VRr7bFVkC&pg=PA138#v=onepage&q=emself&f=false https://books.google.com/books?id=SK3VRr7bFVkC&pg=PA138#v=on...
      - tangled_zans 11y ago
        I referred to the OP with a gendered pronoun because he misnamed Caitlyn and it is well known that men are more likely to mislabel trans women, as well as more likely to be trolls online - as you are being now, so I assume that you are male too. I will leave you to it now, well done for your little essay.

by cglace 11y ago

tangled_zans 11y ago

Hmm, you are right, I read into it a bit too much. Like I said, I felt insulted by you labelling my off-hand comment as "outrage", especially after you agreed that I was factually correct. In hindsight I can see why you took offence to my original comment, but there is a massive difference in connotation between saying "I am offended" and "you are outraged". [0] As I am a big proponent of free speech online, your implication of what I should and should not be able to say has been quite vexing to me, hence my annoyance. But I shouldn't have conflated that with whatever your views on trans women are. [0] http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2164 http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2164

garrettgrimsley 11y ago
>As I am a big proponent of free speech online, your implication of what I should and should not be able to say has been quite vexing to me, hence my annoyance. See >Stop reading so far into it. and >Be civil. [0] [0] https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html
- tangled_zans 11y ago
  Yes I think I've already reached an understanding with the OP, but thanks for chiming in.
  - garrettgrimsley 11y ago
    You're welcome! One last thing, I noticed that you referred to OP using a gendered pronoun. Given that women (and other genders too!) are allowed to use the Internet in many countries [0] it is best to not gender pseudo-anonymous entities who have not explicitly signaled their gender or preferred pronouns. Unlike in Portuguese, Spanish, or whatever your native tongue may be, in English there are gender-neutral pronouns available. Two possible alternatives are singular they [1] or the Spivak pronoun e [2]. Defaulting to masculine pronouns as you did creates an environment that is unwelcoming and hostile for some, so to foster a welcoming space for all you should default to gender-neutral language. Overall your English is pretty good, keep practicing! Just wanted to clear that up, and thanks again! [0] https://www.itu.int/net/wsis/docs/geneva/official/dop.html https://www.itu.int/net/wsis/docs/geneva/official/dop.html [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singular_they https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singular_they [2] https://books.google.com/books?id=SK3VRr7bFVkC&pg=PA138#v=onepage&q=emself&f=false https://books.google.com/books?id=SK3VRr7bFVkC&pg=PA138#v=on...
    - tangled_zans 11y ago
      I referred to the OP with a gendered pronoun because he misnamed Caitlyn and it is well known that men are more likely to mislabel trans women, as well as more likely to be trolls online - as you are being now, so I assume that you are male too. I will leave you to it now, well done for your little essay.