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> I wish more elderly people would decouple their loss of youth from their self regard. I think Garner's point is that we live in a society in which other peop

> I wish more elderly people would decouple their loss of youth from their self regard. I think Garner's point is that we live in a society in which other people's regard for your worth is a function of your age.

epimetheus 11y ago
And yet, hypocritically, she negatively judges the youth as such.
- WalterSear 11y ago
  Furthermore, she considers a innocent question from a child as a insult to her age and gender.
  - rustynails77 11y ago
    That's not the half of it. This author deserves no respect based on that article. She is typical of "me me me" and the continual flow of sexism we see from Australian journalists. The last few decades in Australian media have been a dark spot. This author is sexist, arrogant and takes pride in yanking a strange girl's hair (which is tantamount to assault). "In two strides I was behind the schoolgirl. I reached up, seized her ponytail at the roots and gave it a sharp downward yank." "My only regret is that I couldn’t see the Asian woman’s face at the moment the schoolgirl’s head jerked back and her insolent grin turned into a rictus."
    - humanrebar 11y ago
      Also: "The armed child behind the police station counter unable to conceal her boredom...."
    - WalterSear 11y ago
      Yes, however I originally felt uncomfortable commenting much further here, at the risk of being accused of sexism.
cgriswald 11y ago
Not all cultures have this function in which worth is inversely proportional to age. It is something we are taught by society and choose (as individuals) to believe or reject. When you are young, it is inticing, because we are young and therefore this idea means we have great worth. The problem is most people hold on to the idea even when they are older and it becomes dysfunctional; they can't let it go and society tells them they are right to not let it go. How we are regarded is largely a function of how we allow ourselves to be regarded. Rejecting other people's regard when it is based on faulty premises is one of the gifts of age, that, sadly, not everyone acquires. Self regard is the cure for the disregard of others.
bambax 11y ago
The society where "elders" were regarded as wells of wisdom probably never existed. In every society but our own, women after 40 were considered very old. Helen Garner, born Nov. 1942, is 73 years old. She appears to be really full of herself, which is maybe how old people are. She should be happy to be alive instead of complaining about young people being young.
- onesixtythree 11y ago
  The society where "elders" were regarded as wells of wisdom probably never existed. Not true. Traditional Asian societies take the other extreme and venerate age (probably more than they should, but that's another topic). Hence, you have 90-year-old patriarchs calling shots in family businesses, and middle-aged men whose parents were still alive were traditionally considered still adolescent. Also, not taking care of your parents is a jailable crime in China. In every society but our own, women after 40 were considered very old. I'm a man under 40, so this may not be my fight, but... Fuck. That. Shit. While it is true that middle-aged, unmarried women were once considered undesirable and suspect, that was in societies in which urinating at the dinner table was socially acceptable, childbirth meant a 1-in-25 chance of dying, indoor plumbing didn't exist, and tuberculosis was a death sentence. She should be happy to be alive instead of complaining about young people being young. She's not complaining about young people being young. She's complaining about people (often with no reference to their age) being stupid. Not all young people are stupid.
  - gohrt 11y ago
    > patriarchs >> women after 40 > not taking care of your parents is a jailable crime in China. Nothing about "wisdom" in there.
- rustynails77 11y ago
  >The society where "elders" were regarded as wells of wisdom probably never existed. Historically, the Greeks (as one example) respected the opinions of wise elders, "Monarchies in ancient Greece were not absolute because there was usually a council of older citizens (the senate, or in Macedonia the congress) who gave advice to the King." https://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ancient_Greece https://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ancient_Greece From my own experience, I always sought adults that I felt I could learn from. Even as a kid, I remember thinking some older people gave bad advice and some showed great insight and used this to focus my attention. My own kids seem to echo similar sentiments to my own at the same age.

epimetheus 11y ago

And yet, hypocritically, she negatively judges the youth as such.

WalterSear 11y ago
Furthermore, she considers a innocent question from a child as a insult to her age and gender.
- rustynails77 11y ago
  That's not the half of it. This author deserves no respect based on that article. She is typical of "me me me" and the continual flow of sexism we see from Australian journalists. The last few decades in Australian media have been a dark spot. This author is sexist, arrogant and takes pride in yanking a strange girl's hair (which is tantamount to assault). "In two strides I was behind the schoolgirl. I reached up, seized her ponytail at the roots and gave it a sharp downward yank." "My only regret is that I couldn’t see the Asian woman’s face at the moment the schoolgirl’s head jerked back and her insolent grin turned into a rictus."
  - humanrebar 11y ago
    Also: "The armed child behind the police station counter unable to conceal her boredom...."
  - WalterSear 11y ago
    Yes, however I originally felt uncomfortable commenting much further here, at the risk of being accused of sexism.

cgriswald 11y ago

Not all cultures have this function in which worth is inversely proportional to age. It is something we are taught by society and choose (as individuals) to believe or reject. When you are young, it is inticing, because we are young and therefore this idea means we have great worth. The problem is most people hold on to the idea even when they are older and it becomes dysfunctional; they can't let it go and society tells them they are right to not let it go. How we are regarded is largely a function of how we allow ourselves to be regarded. Rejecting other people's regard when it is based on faulty premises is one of the gifts of age, that, sadly, not everyone acquires. Self regard is the cure for the disregard of others.

bambax 11y ago

The society where "elders" were regarded as wells of wisdom probably never existed. In every society but our own, women after 40 were considered very old. Helen Garner, born Nov. 1942, is 73 years old. She appears to be really full of herself, which is maybe how old people are. She should be happy to be alive instead of complaining about young people being young.

onesixtythree 11y ago
The society where "elders" were regarded as wells of wisdom probably never existed. Not true. Traditional Asian societies take the other extreme and venerate age (probably more than they should, but that's another topic). Hence, you have 90-year-old patriarchs calling shots in family businesses, and middle-aged men whose parents were still alive were traditionally considered still adolescent. Also, not taking care of your parents is a jailable crime in China. In every society but our own, women after 40 were considered very old. I'm a man under 40, so this may not be my fight, but... Fuck. That. Shit. While it is true that middle-aged, unmarried women were once considered undesirable and suspect, that was in societies in which urinating at the dinner table was socially acceptable, childbirth meant a 1-in-25 chance of dying, indoor plumbing didn't exist, and tuberculosis was a death sentence. She should be happy to be alive instead of complaining about young people being young. She's not complaining about young people being young. She's complaining about people (often with no reference to their age) being stupid. Not all young people are stupid.
- gohrt 11y ago
  > patriarchs >> women after 40 > not taking care of your parents is a jailable crime in China. Nothing about "wisdom" in there.
rustynails77 11y ago
>The society where "elders" were regarded as wells of wisdom probably never existed. Historically, the Greeks (as one example) respected the opinions of wise elders, "Monarchies in ancient Greece were not absolute because there was usually a council of older citizens (the senate, or in Macedonia the congress) who gave advice to the King." https://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ancient_Greece https://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ancient_Greece From my own experience, I always sought adults that I felt I could learn from. Even as a kid, I remember thinking some older people gave bad advice and some showed great insight and used this to focus my attention. My own kids seem to echo similar sentiments to my own at the same age.