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In a similar way that some parents will fruitlessly try to coax their children into being the sports starts they want/wanted to be, for some children the "diggi

In a similar way that some parents will fruitlessly try to coax their children into being the sports starts they want/wanted to be, for some children the "digging about in the computer" bug just won't catch. I hope it won't be too disappointing for you... there's a whole world of experiences to explore with your daughters! I'm on the older edge or in the early middle of the Millennial generation, depending who defines the generation. As such I grew up and grew into technology just as we were getting really immersive operating system UI/UX. I remember fondly the green screen, text-based, 5.25" floppy games we had in elementary school, as well as the immersive film-like experiences today. Chemistry sets were kinda boring, Couldn't have cared less about my Dad's Erector sets, much to his disappointment. I built a few model cars and a F-14 over a span of 6 months, then those lived in a box never to be heard from again. And even in the computer... hacking around in the depths of my parents' computers was never the fun thing. But getting into web development was super cool, because it was raw, new, etc. Even as I look around, the companies I find exciting are more often web software vice native OS. I'm learning to appreciate embedded systems and very low level machine management, but it still doesn't have that spark like hacking about in GeoCities did... What's the raw, new, interesting tech today? I don't wonder if part of it is figuring out what might be the new version of playing with hobby boards or experimenting in system drivers. Even for me, getting a diode wired up to light up as a kid was super boring. But wiring up an iOS app might be super interesting now. Or, maybe your girls would rather be lawyers or vets or oil rig mechanics. I hear that's part of the fun of parenting :)

beachstartup 11y ago
my parents tried hard (real, real hard) to get me to play tennis and piano, and refused to let me spend as much time on the computer as i wanted to. guess which i did at 2 in the morning while they were asleep? guess which i dropped like a bad habit as soon as i left the house? and this was in the 90s, when dot com mania was at its height. newsflash: parents live vicariously through their kids and project all sorts of desires onto them, and it almost never turns out well (i went through a real trouble period that i attribute to their parenting style). seems like a lot of people just forget this once they have children. it must be biological because you can't explain it otherwise - these are smart people that do this. my parents are both highly educated with graduate degrees. (or.. maybe that explains it)
- Verdex_Alt 11y ago
  I think there are two things at play here. The first is that people are predisposed to love and take care of their children (and there's a bunch of associated brain chemistry that helps with that). And the second is that there exist people who don't understand that not everyone is interested in the thing that they are interested in. [This second one seems to be completely uncorrelated with intelligence ... as far as I can tell. Maybe a personality spectrum thing?] Anyway. If you mix the two together you get people who insist that their children must be exactly like them because otherwise their children would be doomed and that would be unthinkable. More intelligence (and/or forceful personality / competence) may make the problem worse because clearly you know what you're doing (after all you can describe the thing with such great an articulate words) the problem must be this ungrateful child that doesn't know you're paving a golden path.
- ashark 11y ago
  I have a theory that you'll have a very hard time teaching your kids to be into something if you're not. Kids whose parents play a sport on the weekends or who play music regularly are probably more likely to stick with those things, at least recreationally[1]. Eat your veggies (which probably means you're cooking tasty veggie dishes) and your kids will. Even values, like "learning is important" may work like this. Bet they'll study better if they see you learning new things, watching you struggle and gradually gain understanding and skills. "Reading is super important!" says parent who only reads instruction manuals, Facebook, and (maybe) garbage fiction. "You will practice the piano!" says parent who hasn't played a note on an instrument since high school. "Get your ass out of bed and to tennis practice!" says parent who wheezes going up a flight of stairs. "Math is vital to your future success!" says parent who can count the times they've used anything past 8th grade math as an adult on one hand. Show, don't tell, I guess. [1] Nearly of people I've encountered who were serious amateur or part-time pro musicians came from families that played music, not families that played no music but insisted their kids take piano lessons, for example.

beachstartup 11y ago

my parents tried hard (real, real hard) to get me to play tennis and piano, and refused to let me spend as much time on the computer as i wanted to. guess which i did at 2 in the morning while they were asleep? guess which i dropped like a bad habit as soon as i left the house? and this was in the 90s, when dot com mania was at its height. newsflash: parents live vicariously through their kids and project all sorts of desires onto them, and it almost never turns out well (i went through a real trouble period that i attribute to their parenting style). seems like a lot of people just forget this once they have children. it must be biological because you can't explain it otherwise - these are smart people that do this. my parents are both highly educated with graduate degrees. (or.. maybe that explains it)

Verdex_Alt 11y ago
I think there are two things at play here. The first is that people are predisposed to love and take care of their children (and there's a bunch of associated brain chemistry that helps with that). And the second is that there exist people who don't understand that not everyone is interested in the thing that they are interested in. [This second one seems to be completely uncorrelated with intelligence ... as far as I can tell. Maybe a personality spectrum thing?] Anyway. If you mix the two together you get people who insist that their children must be exactly like them because otherwise their children would be doomed and that would be unthinkable. More intelligence (and/or forceful personality / competence) may make the problem worse because clearly you know what you're doing (after all you can describe the thing with such great an articulate words) the problem must be this ungrateful child that doesn't know you're paving a golden path.
ashark 11y ago
I have a theory that you'll have a very hard time teaching your kids to be into something if you're not. Kids whose parents play a sport on the weekends or who play music regularly are probably more likely to stick with those things, at least recreationally[1]. Eat your veggies (which probably means you're cooking tasty veggie dishes) and your kids will. Even values, like "learning is important" may work like this. Bet they'll study better if they see you learning new things, watching you struggle and gradually gain understanding and skills. "Reading is super important!" says parent who only reads instruction manuals, Facebook, and (maybe) garbage fiction. "You will practice the piano!" says parent who hasn't played a note on an instrument since high school. "Get your ass out of bed and to tennis practice!" says parent who wheezes going up a flight of stairs. "Math is vital to your future success!" says parent who can count the times they've used anything past 8th grade math as an adult on one hand. Show, don't tell, I guess. [1] Nearly of people I've encountered who were serious amateur or part-time pro musicians came from families that played music, not families that played no music but insisted their kids take piano lessons, for example.