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I was homeless for about a year and a half. The first 6 months were spent sleeping on the streets, and when possible, in a shelter - but realistically, in the a

I was homeless for about a year and a half. The first 6 months were spent sleeping on the streets, and when possible, in a shelter - but realistically, in the area where I was, most shelters were not really a safe place to be, and the few that were filled up early. The remaining time, I crashed at a drug dealers house and helped sell in return. I didn't have much more than the belongings that fit in a mid-sized duffle bag and for a while I mostly survived by cleaning bathrooms at coffee shops before opening hours where the employees didn't really want to do that part of their job - and in return I would get some coffee and a bite to eat. Any money I did get, I saved up. Once I had access to the internet again, and at least a warm place to sleep at night that I considered safe, I started making contacts on IRC. Eventually I had enough money to relocate across country via Greyhound, a couch to crash on when I arrived and prospects for a new beginning. I quickly jumped from $25k to $40k to $60k etc and am currently at $160k with a whole new life and an amazing career ahead of me. It's possible to get out of the situation if what got you there isn't addiction or mental illness - the system does little to help, and without being resourceful it's easy to get stuck in that position for a long time. But it can be done. Granted, I never had the ex-con/drug dealer status haunting me in background checks, but I have been upfront in interviews before and still got the job. Greatest accomplishment in life? Escaping homelessness.

gabalese 11y ago
Great story indeed, and really inspirational. But that just reaffirms what other commenters already pointed out: the problem is not homelessness per se, but a (unfair) criminal record that doesn't mix really well with a job in security. What I find incredible, though, it's that this record still persists after he has been cleared of the past accusations.
- deleted 11y ago
  [deleted]
- Filligree 11y ago
  It persists on the internet. This type of situation is essentially the reasoning behind the EU's "right to be forgotten".
coldtea 11y ago
>It's possible to get out of the situation if what got you there isn't addiction or mental illness - the system does little to help, and without being resourceful it's easy to get stuck in that position for a long time. But it can be done. Glad it worked out in the end for you! I have a small issue though with the "it can be done" thing. Getting to have 10 top 10 hits at the charts can be done too. The question is how easy it is, and what percentage will be able to do it. The reason I'm saying that is that, while giving the message "it can be done" is good and can help people not give up in a similar situation, it can also give the false idea that it's a workable situation when it might not be save for very few outliers (and even for them, mostly when the right "stars" and chances are aligned, and not just due to their determination and work). This also gives some people a chance to overlook the issue, thinking ("it can't be done, so people who don't do it are just lazy, not trying enough, thus, we don't need to help them"). For such issues who plague thousands, people who have escaped can often be the worse sources to learn about the difficulty of the situation -- because they tend to generalize their outlier experience (and sometimes minimize the chances that helped them escape), and sometimes look back at others still in the same situation as not trying enough (since that will justify their self-image as them being "more worthy/resourceful/persistent" than them).
- exhomeless 11y ago
  I am certainly an outlier and am not sure what the probability of it occurring really is. I think there are systemic issues in how homelessness is treated that I was lucky enough to get past - what concerns me is the lack of support and aide that people in that situation actually receive. Addiction and mental illness barely gets the attention it deserves, and getting people back on their feet is extremely tough regardless of their determination, or skills. I don't want to make it seem easy, because it certainly wasn't - and maybe I did have a one-up in terms of resourcefulness - but without changes in the way homelessness is treated, from government as well as how it can be stigmatized, it's an additional blocker for those trying to re-enter society and make a difference in their lives.
- realisation 11y ago
  There's two parts to this issue. One is being successful by typical worldly standard. The other are emotional scars. Maybe, it's not necessarily feasible for everyone to achieve hoisting themselves from homelessness into a white collar above average paying job. Maybe that's not possible. But this is besides the point. What is eminently more possible is achieving emotional worthiness. When a person is rejected, however that came to be, this activates a physiological response in them which causes them to perceive scarcity, which wreaks havoc on any number of processes in daily life that, building up, can rip a person down. What are the antidotes to this response? In my experience, gratitude is a strong antidote, when & where you can find it.
RealGeek 11y ago
Glad you were able to break the vicious cycle and build a career. What job do you do now? What skills / education helped you get the job?
- exhomeless 11y ago
  Engineering - self taught, and I have a GED (for non-U.S., this is a credential that is treated as an equivalent to passing high school).
  - curiousDog 11y ago
    That is very cool. How many years of experience did it take you to get to $160k? That's top of the line if you aren't at a hot tech startup isn't it?
  - ambicapter 11y ago
    So you haven't taken the professional engineering exam (forget what its called)? What was the first job you got out of homelessness?
    - knd775 11y ago
      "PE Exam" ;)
buro9 11y ago
Fully escaped? I've spoken openly of my 30 months sleeping rough on the streets of the UK. I may have "escaped" homelessness, but the mental scars accumulated whilst on the street do still haunt me. I feel it, the sense of worthlessness, the self-doubt. There's a feeling that I shouldn't be alive let alone here in this workplace or surrounded by good people, a feeling that I don't quite belong. One can put a roof over one's head, get a job, that leads to a career, obtain an income that is above-average... but can one truly escape something as traumatic as being homeless for any sustained period of time (covering 1 Winter at least)? I'm less sure on that. I live in the hope that I'm wrong. And of course, Christmas comes around and people return to family and those who don't are the waifs and strays, an annual reminder that we're not the same.
- exhomeless 11y ago
  Personally, yes I think I have fully escaped. It's been 16 years since then, and I see my scars as a personal trophy of sorts - a motivator on what I can accomplish if I set my mind to it. It wasn't always like this - but it's what I have conditioned myself to do after the traumas that I have endured related and unrelated to the homelessness. I hope that you are working to get past any demons that haunt you - you deserve it, everyone does.
- RyJones 11y ago
  I haven't lived in my car since 92 or so and I still notice nice places to park where the police won't bug me.
  - buro9 11y ago
    I still notice ways into building sites, where I know the site office will be unlocked and there will be a small electric heater and a kettle. A safe place, providing I get out around 5am.
- DanBC 11y ago
  May I ask: What would have helped? And what would help now? Homeless people and people who are vulnerably housed in the UK have pretty lousy treatment from "services", a lot of which is provided by faith and voluntary groups. There are huge amounts of stigma, and a lot of misunderstanding of alcoholism and drug use and mental illness.
Bahamut 11y ago
I too have a somewhat similar, but not quite same story myself - I spent 2 years homeless, but I had a roof above my head from various friends throughout that time. I was still poor though - nothing homed that in more than being so poor that one week, I ate oatmeal almost exclusively for a week. I had sold most of my material possessions as well, excepting my clothes and desktop/laptop & monitor. Somehow I mustered up the will to continue job searching throughout that whole time, even putting up with a really crappy situation at one point where I had to sleep in the same room as a former friend who would masturbate loudly at night, thinking I was asleep (but the noise would be what would wake me up). Job searching alone did not prove fruitful in my case - after 2 years, I pivoted into teaching myself programming, and entered the web development profession a half year later with a modest ~$50k salary for my first job. Slightly more than 3 years later, I am now at a $160k salary with a career that shines brightly with substantial open source software work. Fear of being caught blindsided & not prepared propels me to continue to work hard and develop my career. The last thing I want is to regress into that situation again.

gabalese 11y ago

Great story indeed, and really inspirational. But that just reaffirms what other commenters already pointed out: the problem is not homelessness per se, but a (unfair) criminal record that doesn't mix really well with a job in security. What I find incredible, though, it's that this record still persists after he has been cleared of the past accusations.

deleted 11y ago
[deleted]
Filligree 11y ago
It persists on the internet. This type of situation is essentially the reasoning behind the EU's "right to be forgotten".

coldtea 11y ago

>It's possible to get out of the situation if what got you there isn't addiction or mental illness - the system does little to help, and without being resourceful it's easy to get stuck in that position for a long time. But it can be done. Glad it worked out in the end for you! I have a small issue though with the "it can be done" thing. Getting to have 10 top 10 hits at the charts can be done too. The question is how easy it is, and what percentage will be able to do it. The reason I'm saying that is that, while giving the message "it can be done" is good and can help people not give up in a similar situation, it can also give the false idea that it's a workable situation when it might not be save for very few outliers (and even for them, mostly when the right "stars" and chances are aligned, and not just due to their determination and work). This also gives some people a chance to overlook the issue, thinking ("it can't be done, so people who don't do it are just lazy, not trying enough, thus, we don't need to help them"). For such issues who plague thousands, people who have escaped can often be the worse sources to learn about the difficulty of the situation -- because they tend to generalize their outlier experience (and sometimes minimize the chances that helped them escape), and sometimes look back at others still in the same situation as not trying enough (since that will justify their self-image as them being "more worthy/resourceful/persistent" than them).

exhomeless 11y ago
I am certainly an outlier and am not sure what the probability of it occurring really is. I think there are systemic issues in how homelessness is treated that I was lucky enough to get past - what concerns me is the lack of support and aide that people in that situation actually receive. Addiction and mental illness barely gets the attention it deserves, and getting people back on their feet is extremely tough regardless of their determination, or skills. I don't want to make it seem easy, because it certainly wasn't - and maybe I did have a one-up in terms of resourcefulness - but without changes in the way homelessness is treated, from government as well as how it can be stigmatized, it's an additional blocker for those trying to re-enter society and make a difference in their lives.
realisation 11y ago
There's two parts to this issue. One is being successful by typical worldly standard. The other are emotional scars. Maybe, it's not necessarily feasible for everyone to achieve hoisting themselves from homelessness into a white collar above average paying job. Maybe that's not possible. But this is besides the point. What is eminently more possible is achieving emotional worthiness. When a person is rejected, however that came to be, this activates a physiological response in them which causes them to perceive scarcity, which wreaks havoc on any number of processes in daily life that, building up, can rip a person down. What are the antidotes to this response? In my experience, gratitude is a strong antidote, when & where you can find it.

RealGeek 11y ago

Glad you were able to break the vicious cycle and build a career. What job do you do now? What skills / education helped you get the job?

exhomeless 11y ago
Engineering - self taught, and I have a GED (for non-U.S., this is a credential that is treated as an equivalent to passing high school).
- curiousDog 11y ago
  That is very cool. How many years of experience did it take you to get to $160k? That's top of the line if you aren't at a hot tech startup isn't it?
- ambicapter 11y ago
  So you haven't taken the professional engineering exam (forget what its called)? What was the first job you got out of homelessness?
  - knd775 11y ago
    "PE Exam" ;)

buro9 11y ago

Fully escaped? I've spoken openly of my 30 months sleeping rough on the streets of the UK. I may have "escaped" homelessness, but the mental scars accumulated whilst on the street do still haunt me. I feel it, the sense of worthlessness, the self-doubt. There's a feeling that I shouldn't be alive let alone here in this workplace or surrounded by good people, a feeling that I don't quite belong. One can put a roof over one's head, get a job, that leads to a career, obtain an income that is above-average... but can one truly escape something as traumatic as being homeless for any sustained period of time (covering 1 Winter at least)? I'm less sure on that. I live in the hope that I'm wrong. And of course, Christmas comes around and people return to family and those who don't are the waifs and strays, an annual reminder that we're not the same.

exhomeless 11y ago
Personally, yes I think I have fully escaped. It's been 16 years since then, and I see my scars as a personal trophy of sorts - a motivator on what I can accomplish if I set my mind to it. It wasn't always like this - but it's what I have conditioned myself to do after the traumas that I have endured related and unrelated to the homelessness. I hope that you are working to get past any demons that haunt you - you deserve it, everyone does.
RyJones 11y ago
I haven't lived in my car since 92 or so and I still notice nice places to park where the police won't bug me.
- buro9 11y ago
  I still notice ways into building sites, where I know the site office will be unlocked and there will be a small electric heater and a kettle. A safe place, providing I get out around 5am.
DanBC 11y ago
May I ask: What would have helped? And what would help now? Homeless people and people who are vulnerably housed in the UK have pretty lousy treatment from "services", a lot of which is provided by faith and voluntary groups. There are huge amounts of stigma, and a lot of misunderstanding of alcoholism and drug use and mental illness.

Bahamut 11y ago

I too have a somewhat similar, but not quite same story myself - I spent 2 years homeless, but I had a roof above my head from various friends throughout that time. I was still poor though - nothing homed that in more than being so poor that one week, I ate oatmeal almost exclusively for a week. I had sold most of my material possessions as well, excepting my clothes and desktop/laptop & monitor. Somehow I mustered up the will to continue job searching throughout that whole time, even putting up with a really crappy situation at one point where I had to sleep in the same room as a former friend who would masturbate loudly at night, thinking I was asleep (but the noise would be what would wake me up). Job searching alone did not prove fruitful in my case - after 2 years, I pivoted into teaching myself programming, and entered the web development profession a half year later with a modest ~$50k salary for my first job. Slightly more than 3 years later, I am now at a $160k salary with a career that shines brightly with substantial open source software work. Fear of being caught blindsided & not prepared propels me to continue to work hard and develop my career. The last thing I want is to regress into that situation again.