But what if you are thinking about why you shouldn't be angry and how society would look down on you in this moment. To just throw that all away and be "angry"

But what if you are thinking about why you shouldn't be angry and how society would look down on you in this moment. To just throw that all away and be "angry" instead of "was starting to be angry and then restrained youself" you are not practicing Zen because you are artificially restraining yourself from restraining yourself.