As someone who was bothered by a fear of death from a young age, I always thought I would want to die in a blaze of glory - skiing off a huge cliff, skydiving,

As someone who was bothered by a fear of death from a young age, I always thought I would want to die in a blaze of glory - skiing off a huge cliff, skydiving, etc... But as I aged (still young, only 34) I found, what I think, is the perfect summation of how I want to die (I forget the author, in a hurry and google is failing me. Probably Neruda): "I want to die at the end of the day // in the high seas // with my face towards the sky // when it seems like agony is just a dream // and the soul, a bird ascending in flight // Let there be no sad tears as I draw my last breath, // At one and alone with the sky and the sea, // No sobbing, nor prayer, nor laments of death // I only would hear the deep waves cover me // To die when the bright glow of twilight is fading, // and catches the waves in its last net of light // to be like that sun as its luminous shading // expires and is lost in the arms of the night // To die, and die young, before time has destroyed // the delicate fabric illusion has spun // when life can still say: “I am yours” but the void // Of a final echo tells us death has won!" How exactly to attain that feeling, I am unsure...