4 ms·

Team, We're cutting 336 people from our workforce. Sorry for that. We'll offer each person a generous exit package and help finding a new job. Jack

by Mahn 11y ago

yuvadam 11y ago
Team, 336 people will be fired. We hope it brings our stock price back up. Jack
- deleted 11y ago
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- bshimmin 11y ago
  This is like corporate email golfing, I love it. I propose "Hey" instead of "Team".
  - masklinn 11y ago
    Hey, Stock in the dumps, 336 chumps are fired. Jack
    - ethbro 11y ago
      Plus side: would definitely fit in a tweet.
      - flashman 11y ago
        @jack: "just slimming down my twttr"
    - Mahn 11y ago
      Yo, 336 people out. We'll compensate. J.
      - williamguerra 11y ago
        employees -= 336
      - butwhy 11y ago
        Hey, you stole Elon's schtick: https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/652605371857530880 https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/652605371857530880
    - dexcs 11y ago
      Twitter's Servers are running autonom. We just do not need you anymore... Thanks... AI
      - fnordfnordfnord 11y ago
        Error: No payroll records for your username. ("We fixed the glitch!"
        superfunc 11y ago
        <3 office space
        masklinn 11y ago
        That's not far from reality either: https://twitter.com/bartt/status/653946266938818561 https://twitter.com/bartt/status/653946266938818561 > I've been impacted by $TWTR's layoffs. This is how I found out this morning. [screenshot of iOS account showing inaccessible @twitter.com account]
    - phpnode 11y ago
      at least make it rhyme! Hey, Stock in the dumps, firing 336 chumps. Jack
  - VLM 11y ago
    In this particular example, whats important is keeping the character count under 140, so your proposal wins 1 point. (insert golf clap). I will see your "Hey", and counter propose "Yo". That frees up two characters for use elsewhere vs the original "Team".
- deleted 11y ago
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