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But getting someone's Facebook is less socially awkward than their email address. You can also remember them easier and communicate with them faster. Most of

But getting someone's Facebook is less socially awkward than their email address. You can also remember them easier and communicate with them faster. Most of the people I met this summer didn't have an American phone number so Facebook (or Whatsapp) was the only way to communicate with them.

detaro 11y ago
> But getting someone's Facebook is less socially awkward than their email address. Really depends on the setting. Quite a few people I know would be more comfortable sharing a mail address than their Facebook info, even if we ignore the percentage that doesn't even have Facebook. (For quick messaging contacts the fragmentation of messengers is really annoying. I don't want 4-6 different messengers on my phone just to be prepared to communicate with everybody. It's really time for a push back to federation or at least proper multi-protocol clients)
- justizin 11y ago
  >> But getting someone's Facebook is less socially awkward than their email address. >Really depends on the setting. Quite a few people I know would be more comfortable sharing a mail address than their Facebook info, even if we ignore the percentage that doesn't even have Facebook. This is part of what's backwards about Facebook. Sometimes I've had a 5-15min conversation with someone at a bar and they're like, "Do you have Facebook?", and I'm like, "Give me your phone", and I will search for myself and send myself a friend request. If I exchanged phone numbers or e-mail addresses with this person, it would be really odd IMO to ask the sort of questions to which answers are offered to me by facebook, and by its' algorithm, but _less_ odd to personally contact them IMO. So I'm kind of a wierd voyeur in basically a handful of strangers' lives and fairly rarely actually ever again meet up and do things with various people that seem to be a lot of fun to talk to when I meet them. I've had a lot of interesting friendship circumstances arise, but also just spend a lot of time wondering who the fuck most of the people are, even on the new facebook. Even the people I decided to carry over, I don't know, it's a semi-random distribution based on how Facebook was already filtering my feed, I think. People I like, but I dunno. It feels like Facebook has more influence over who I think about than I do at times, and I wonder if it isn't influenced by what relationships tell them things they can advertise based on or something.
  - detaro 11y ago
    Hadn't thought about that aspect, but that's of course right: a random mail address only gives you a way to contact someone, but not other context. It's great if you have something specific you want to follow up on, otherwise it just gets filed away. Or can be used to give Facebook/Twitter/whatever else information the next day if you want to (after thinking about it). Mail addresses can be more anonymous and easier to dispose in that way, if you have clearly separated ones.
simoncion 11y ago
> But getting someone's Facebook is less socially awkward than their email address. I don't understand why this would be. Would you explain why -for your cohort- this is true?
- lmm 11y ago
  An email address feels more intimate - it's something a romantic partner would have but a friend wouldn't necessarily. And asking someone for an email address is asking them to spend thirty seconds spelling things out (particularly in a bar), and another thirty waiting for you to send them an email to confirm. Facebook is just a question of typing their name, which you already know - often it can autocomplete based on your network - and they get a notification if you've done it right without needing any extra step.
  - jschwartzi 11y ago
    I feel like the typing/confirmation issue could be solved by adding a QR code generator to your email app, and having them scan the QR code on your phone to share details. You already have your phone out, and they probably have to take theirs out to confirm, so it doesn't add anything that doesn't already exist. But this application of QR Codes saves typing in a good way.
    - detaro 11y ago
      Assuming the other person has a QR code reader app and knows how to use it. And if you want their info vs giving them yours, then they also have to know how to get their address displayed as a code. Technically no problem, in practice I wouldn't expect it to work.
    - saryant 11y ago
      Facebook used to have this feature but I can't find it anymore. I only found out about it after meeting someone in Tokyo and have never been able to find the feature since which leads me to wonder if it's geofenced.
  - 11y ago

detaro 11y ago

> But getting someone's Facebook is less socially awkward than their email address. Really depends on the setting. Quite a few people I know would be more comfortable sharing a mail address than their Facebook info, even if we ignore the percentage that doesn't even have Facebook. (For quick messaging contacts the fragmentation of messengers is really annoying. I don't want 4-6 different messengers on my phone just to be prepared to communicate with everybody. It's really time for a push back to federation or at least proper multi-protocol clients)

justizin 11y ago
>> But getting someone's Facebook is less socially awkward than their email address. >Really depends on the setting. Quite a few people I know would be more comfortable sharing a mail address than their Facebook info, even if we ignore the percentage that doesn't even have Facebook. This is part of what's backwards about Facebook. Sometimes I've had a 5-15min conversation with someone at a bar and they're like, "Do you have Facebook?", and I'm like, "Give me your phone", and I will search for myself and send myself a friend request. If I exchanged phone numbers or e-mail addresses with this person, it would be really odd IMO to ask the sort of questions to which answers are offered to me by facebook, and by its' algorithm, but _less_ odd to personally contact them IMO. So I'm kind of a wierd voyeur in basically a handful of strangers' lives and fairly rarely actually ever again meet up and do things with various people that seem to be a lot of fun to talk to when I meet them. I've had a lot of interesting friendship circumstances arise, but also just spend a lot of time wondering who the fuck most of the people are, even on the new facebook. Even the people I decided to carry over, I don't know, it's a semi-random distribution based on how Facebook was already filtering my feed, I think. People I like, but I dunno. It feels like Facebook has more influence over who I think about than I do at times, and I wonder if it isn't influenced by what relationships tell them things they can advertise based on or something.
- detaro 11y ago
  Hadn't thought about that aspect, but that's of course right: a random mail address only gives you a way to contact someone, but not other context. It's great if you have something specific you want to follow up on, otherwise it just gets filed away. Or can be used to give Facebook/Twitter/whatever else information the next day if you want to (after thinking about it). Mail addresses can be more anonymous and easier to dispose in that way, if you have clearly separated ones.

simoncion 11y ago

> But getting someone's Facebook is less socially awkward than their email address. I don't understand why this would be. Would you explain why -for your cohort- this is true?

lmm 11y ago
An email address feels more intimate - it's something a romantic partner would have but a friend wouldn't necessarily. And asking someone for an email address is asking them to spend thirty seconds spelling things out (particularly in a bar), and another thirty waiting for you to send them an email to confirm. Facebook is just a question of typing their name, which you already know - often it can autocomplete based on your network - and they get a notification if you've done it right without needing any extra step.
- jschwartzi 11y ago
  I feel like the typing/confirmation issue could be solved by adding a QR code generator to your email app, and having them scan the QR code on your phone to share details. You already have your phone out, and they probably have to take theirs out to confirm, so it doesn't add anything that doesn't already exist. But this application of QR Codes saves typing in a good way.
  - detaro 11y ago
    Assuming the other person has a QR code reader app and knows how to use it. And if you want their info vs giving them yours, then they also have to know how to get their address displayed as a code. Technically no problem, in practice I wouldn't expect it to work.
  - saryant 11y ago
    Facebook used to have this feature but I can't find it anymore. I only found out about it after meeting someone in Tokyo and have never been able to find the feature since which leads me to wonder if it's geofenced.
- 11y ago