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> Right, but this is another sexist positive Also, I don't get why pointing out and celebrating the differences in genders (i.e. being sexist) is inherently ba

> Right, but this is another sexist positive Also, I don't get why pointing out and celebrating the differences in genders (i.e. being sexist) is inherently bad. My wife is pregnant, and it's super apparent that if Men were the ones that had babies, there would be no humans left, because as soon as the first guy popped out a kid, they would tell the others how terrible it was, and we'd figure out some way to make babies without having carry them inside us. I get that pregnancy, partum and post-partum creates some sort of dream haze, so that women seem to forget the trauma of pregnancy & child birth. It seems pretty common that despite the "discomfort" regarding pregnancy and newborn care, women fantasize and choose to have multiple children, even those who had "rough" pregnancies.

Mz 11y ago
Wow. I knew a couple. He was over 6 feet tall and she was a little thing. Their first baby was enormous and he missed the birth by minutes. He showed up all excited about the birth of their first baby and she sat up and yelled at him "You are never touching me again!" They went on to have two more kids. My first pregnancy was really hard -- I threw up for 8 months and the birth was hard -- and it took me more than a year to be willing to try again. When I intentionally got pregnant again, I began throwing up and remembered how hard the first pregnancy had been. I think I also had the flu. I told someone "I hope I am pregnant, because this is making me remember my first pregnancy. If I am not already pregnant, I may not have another baby. Ugh. I don't want to go through this again." Hormonal birth control has potentially deadly side effects. Women by the millions take it anyway because the risks and side effects involved are less worse than having babies. Please realize I was a very devoted mother, desperately wanted kids, and still have a strong relationship to my now adult sons. I was baby-crazy in my twenties. I have talked to lots of women over the years and many women a) do not want kids and never did and b) after having the first, took a long time to be willing to try again because it was such a dreadful experience. Women don't do this because being born female makes us more virtuous (or some crap) than men. We do it because we have the equipment, thus it is ours to do. That's it. Also, female or not, memory is state dependent. This is not specific to pregnancy. When I had a serious health crisis and was in constant excruciating pain for more than 3 years, I could CLEARLY remember the birth of my first child. Most of the time, I cannot. I am usually not miserable enough to have good access to those memory pathways. Again, state dependent memory is not some gender based or pregnancy based weirdness. The inability to fully access traumatic memories likely has a protective function for the human race and it is extremely well known, not some "pregnant woman" anomaly.
- balls187 11y ago
  Thank you for sharing your personal experience. If my comment was taken with any form of malice, that was not it's intent. It was mostly a joke at men & natures expense.
  - Mz 11y ago
    In all sincerity, women would have it easier if men did not use us as a means to take "humorous" digs at other men. It only makes our lives harder. There is enough friction between the sexes witbout that kind of thing. Congrats on the pregnancy. Best wishes to you and yours.
    - balls187 11y ago
      > Women would have it easier if men did not use us as a means to take "humorous" digs at other men. It only makes our lives harder. How so?
      - Mz 11y ago
        Lots of men are already pretty hostile towards women. This kind of behavior only fuels that hostility and it is particularly frustrating to see it because it is a situation where a woman does not have to do anything wrong to catch hell over it. A man who presumably thinks he is championing the cause of women can do this and thereby make our lives harder.
        balls187 11y ago
        Your logic does not follow. Lots of men are hostile to women. Making jokes regarding women's issues fuels hostility. Therefore men should not make jokes regarding women's issues. Some people are mentally unstable. Guns in the hands of mentally unstable people can cause catastrophic results. Therefore people should not own guns.
        reinhardt 11y ago

Mz 11y ago

Wow. I knew a couple. He was over 6 feet tall and she was a little thing. Their first baby was enormous and he missed the birth by minutes. He showed up all excited about the birth of their first baby and she sat up and yelled at him "You are never touching me again!" They went on to have two more kids. My first pregnancy was really hard -- I threw up for 8 months and the birth was hard -- and it took me more than a year to be willing to try again. When I intentionally got pregnant again, I began throwing up and remembered how hard the first pregnancy had been. I think I also had the flu. I told someone "I hope I am pregnant, because this is making me remember my first pregnancy. If I am not already pregnant, I may not have another baby. Ugh. I don't want to go through this again." Hormonal birth control has potentially deadly side effects. Women by the millions take it anyway because the risks and side effects involved are less worse than having babies. Please realize I was a very devoted mother, desperately wanted kids, and still have a strong relationship to my now adult sons. I was baby-crazy in my twenties. I have talked to lots of women over the years and many women a) do not want kids and never did and b) after having the first, took a long time to be willing to try again because it was such a dreadful experience. Women don't do this because being born female makes us more virtuous (or some crap) than men. We do it because we have the equipment, thus it is ours to do. That's it. Also, female or not, memory is state dependent. This is not specific to pregnancy. When I had a serious health crisis and was in constant excruciating pain for more than 3 years, I could CLEARLY remember the birth of my first child. Most of the time, I cannot. I am usually not miserable enough to have good access to those memory pathways. Again, state dependent memory is not some gender based or pregnancy based weirdness. The inability to fully access traumatic memories likely has a protective function for the human race and it is extremely well known, not some "pregnant woman" anomaly.

balls187 11y ago
Thank you for sharing your personal experience. If my comment was taken with any form of malice, that was not it's intent. It was mostly a joke at men & natures expense.
- Mz 11y ago
  In all sincerity, women would have it easier if men did not use us as a means to take "humorous" digs at other men. It only makes our lives harder. There is enough friction between the sexes witbout that kind of thing. Congrats on the pregnancy. Best wishes to you and yours.
  - balls187 11y ago
    > Women would have it easier if men did not use us as a means to take "humorous" digs at other men. It only makes our lives harder. How so?
    - Mz 11y ago
      Lots of men are already pretty hostile towards women. This kind of behavior only fuels that hostility and it is particularly frustrating to see it because it is a situation where a woman does not have to do anything wrong to catch hell over it. A man who presumably thinks he is championing the cause of women can do this and thereby make our lives harder.
      - balls187 11y ago
        Your logic does not follow. Lots of men are hostile to women. Making jokes regarding women's issues fuels hostility. Therefore men should not make jokes regarding women's issues. Some people are mentally unstable. Guns in the hands of mentally unstable people can cause catastrophic results. Therefore people should not own guns.
        reinhardt 11y ago