That's one of the creepy, energy-intensive things about being in a group that has historically experienced stereotyping. You wonder, Did I get that because I am

That's one of the creepy, energy-intensive things about being in a group that has historically experienced stereotyping. You wonder, Did I get that because I am a .... or because he's just that way? It's hard to discard the thought, and it takes up processing power while running in the background of your brain. You might argue it's best to just get good at meditation and non-attachment and not even think about it, and that's true to a large extent, but sometimes those signals indicate a real problem person who you'd be better off steering around. I suppose you can flip this around, too: a few guys commenting seem rather angry that their helpful well-meaning attention to women staring into the distance at hackerspaces is not appreciated, and they might consider that the women in question have their own issues and it's not necessarily the guy's problem. So, you see a woman who you assume needs help and it turns out you're wrong -- she's just thinking, or she's happy being stuck because that is part of the fun -- then you say, "Ok, see you around!", stop talking, and leave her to it. It's not your problem that she doesn't want your help. Don't take it personally.