as someone who (like, i guess, many people here), is "smart", what strikes me most about your post is not that you might gain by being a little less obnoxious,

as someone who (like, i guess, many people here), is "smart", what strikes me most about your post is not that you might gain by being a little less obnoxious, but that it's taken you so long to find out. i didn't go to a particularly "tough" school (i'm talking english english now - the place where children learn), but "[not] telling people how smart i am" is a basic survival skill i learnt pretty early on in life. i'm not sure what lesson to draw from that, though. does it mean that you are completely insensitive to what other people think about you? or that you're way, way too desperate to prove yourself? or perhaps it just means you're 6 foot plus and heavy with it? so i'm wondering if there's a broader lesson here. like you need to listen to people a whole lot more (ie over and above being a little more modest)? or love yourself rather than trying to live up to what (perhaps) your parents demanded way back when? sorry if this seems like cheap psychology - not trying to knock you, just thinking out loud.