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Grad school is a bit like that, i think. Especially the bit where your whole identity is constructed around the success of your project resonates with me. Tha

Grad school is a bit like that, i think. Especially the bit where your whole identity is constructed around the success of your project resonates with me. That's a trap that can make it very hard to not get depressed when the going is tough — and of course it's going to be. Bottom line, i think the second to last paragraph offers some very common sense, down-to-earth, and actionable advice. « When we gather our identity from many sources we create a more diversified sense of esteem. We can fail or stumble at one thing and still derive esteem from something else. I can face a challenge in building a new startup, but still redeem esteem from my identity as a writer, musician, hiker, family member. »

dtawfik1 11y ago
This is a real common theme I find in driven people. Throughout my life I have built glass castles, as I like to call them, that I derived my sense of identity from. I was always prone to get into singular focus mode, whether it was school or my business. Over the course of talking to other founders I saw how common and destructive it is; hinging on a subtle form of narcissism. I was inspired to write the article by a vacation I took working at the Special Olympic games. The event was about taking a step outside of your own shoes and deriving esteem from the athletes that were competing. Giving, participating in the lives of others was an antidote to being rapt in yourself and all the liabilities that come with that. It was a powerful way of diversifying our happiness.