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Whoa! That is some seriously messed-up stuff! Imperfect men can either beg for sex or attempt rape? No! Just, no! A thousand times no! I would strongly en

by Frondo 11y ago

Whoa! That is some seriously messed-up stuff! Imperfect men can either beg for sex or attempt rape? No! Just, no! A thousand times no! I would strongly encourage you to talk to a professional mental health practitioner if that's your view on sexual relations. Something has gone seriously off the rails for you, and I hope you'll put in the effort to try and fix things up.

transfire 11y ago
You seemed to have missed what I said about subtlety. When a man takes a woman on a date and pays for it, it's a subtle form of "begging". When a man is forward with a woman in hopes she will like the advances it is subtle form of "taking". You're the one reading only the extremities into what I said.
- dragonwriter 11y ago
  > When a man takes a woman on a date and pays for it, it's a subtle form of "begging". That might be what you are doing when you take a woman out on a date and pay for it, but I can assure you -- as a man who has dated (now happily married) that that is not even close to universally the case. > When a man is forward with a woman in hopes she will like the advances it is subtle form of "taking". That doesn't seem consistent with any reasonable definition of the word "taking", differing in kind rather than degree from anything for which that word is a good fit. Its more like offering than taking -- you are putting your desire on display in the hopes that it will get a positive response; that's not anything like "taking" anything. (Unless its in a context where there is an implicit power dynamic where the expression of interest amounts to an implied threat to take, or an implied threat to impose adverse consequences if the interest isn't fulfilled. But that's a rather special case.)
- angersock 11y ago
  You really need to pick better terminology here, because "begging" and "taking" both have unfortunate additional connotations that are throwing people off from whatever point you think you're making. I kinda figured you were looking at a distinction similar to inbound/outbound marketing, but your example elsewhere of taking somebody out to dinner vs. asking them directly is just bad.
- JohnBooty 11y ago
  I'm sorry you have come to view human relationships as variations on "begging" and "taking." I hope that one day you have happy, healthy relationships where you simply enjoy each others' company and things aren't so transactional.

by Frondo 11y ago

transfire 11y ago

You seemed to have missed what I said about subtlety. When a man takes a woman on a date and pays for it, it's a subtle form of "begging". When a man is forward with a woman in hopes she will like the advances it is subtle form of "taking". You're the one reading only the extremities into what I said.

dragonwriter 11y ago
> When a man takes a woman on a date and pays for it, it's a subtle form of "begging". That might be what you are doing when you take a woman out on a date and pay for it, but I can assure you -- as a man who has dated (now happily married) that that is not even close to universally the case. > When a man is forward with a woman in hopes she will like the advances it is subtle form of "taking". That doesn't seem consistent with any reasonable definition of the word "taking", differing in kind rather than degree from anything for which that word is a good fit. Its more like offering than taking -- you are putting your desire on display in the hopes that it will get a positive response; that's not anything like "taking" anything. (Unless its in a context where there is an implicit power dynamic where the expression of interest amounts to an implied threat to take, or an implied threat to impose adverse consequences if the interest isn't fulfilled. But that's a rather special case.)
angersock 11y ago
You really need to pick better terminology here, because "begging" and "taking" both have unfortunate additional connotations that are throwing people off from whatever point you think you're making. I kinda figured you were looking at a distinction similar to inbound/outbound marketing, but your example elsewhere of taking somebody out to dinner vs. asking them directly is just bad.
JohnBooty 11y ago
I'm sorry you have come to view human relationships as variations on "begging" and "taking." I hope that one day you have happy, healthy relationships where you simply enjoy each others' company and things aren't so transactional.