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> When our first daughter was about a month old, my husband was asked to go on a business trip. I imagine he could have turned that down, but I was insistent th

> When our first daughter was about a month old, my husband was asked to go on a business trip. I imagine he could have turned that down, but I was insistent that he go so that his managers would not worry that his home life was impacting his work ethic. This is the Amazon way, after all. It was also one of the loneliest weeks of my life. Amazon seems to have serious issues, but this one is on the employee/spouse. If you don't protect your personal life/family time, how can you expect the company to? I have young kids so I come in to the office early and don't stay late too often so I can be home with them. I know some upper management probably look down on this, but expectations were clear when I was hired and my boss is OK with it. I realize keeping this balance may disqualify me from ever becoming VP of engineering, but I am more than OK with that if it means being a better spouse and father.

omouse 11y ago
>so that his managers would not worry that his home life was impacting his work ethic It isn't on the employee/spouse; this is why you have managers that sometimes have to tell employees to go home. We're so fearful of losing our jobs that we bend over backwards for employers. This is what happens when employers have an advantage. >I know some upper management probably look down on this So your boss is fine with it but your boss's boss may not be. At least you aren't living in fear of losing your job. >I realize keeping this balance may disqualify me from ever becoming VP of engineering Why should it keep you from becoming VP of engineering? That's messed up.
- ohitsdom 11y ago
  > this is why you have managers that sometimes have to tell employees to go home. Good managers can spot when this is needed. But if the employee is telling the manager that everything is fine and isn't showing signs of home stress, I don't blame the manager. > Why should it keep you from becoming VP of engineering? That's messed up. I think most companies are going to value and reward those who put in extra time consistently over those who don't.
tankerdude 11y ago
The role of management is not to get every last drop of work out of you. With the risk of being redundant, management is really about management. You need to recognize when to push them and when not to. From the looks of it, it's push all the time in the team that this person was over at Amazon. That's a failure of management. It costs a lot to train a new employee, and reduces productivity and morale. So managers worth their salt would do one of many things to prevent this type of burnout. Predictability is what management wants as well as employees, believe it or not. If you are an effective manager, you either create predictability and a good work/life balance or you might as well not be there. You're basically a fire fighter in that case, and it doesn't help with long term predictability. Managers who worth their salt will go to bat to get people the time they want/need. If also need to recognize when it is time to walk away, and that's what I tell people when I do interview. If I don't correct the predictability scenario in terms of meeting business needs, I should be fired. If I don't get the tools that I need to get the results, it would be on me to walk away after informing them of the structural problems (and solutions to help them). I suspect that Amazon has a number of people who are purely focused on the bottom line of velocity and don't care about burn out. I'm sure though, that there are good groups to work for at Amazon, but the ratio might be lower than at other tech companies, from what I gather.

omouse 11y ago

>so that his managers would not worry that his home life was impacting his work ethic It isn't on the employee/spouse; this is why you have managers that sometimes have to tell employees to go home. We're so fearful of losing our jobs that we bend over backwards for employers. This is what happens when employers have an advantage. >I know some upper management probably look down on this So your boss is fine with it but your boss's boss may not be. At least you aren't living in fear of losing your job. >I realize keeping this balance may disqualify me from ever becoming VP of engineering Why should it keep you from becoming VP of engineering? That's messed up.

ohitsdom 11y ago
> this is why you have managers that sometimes have to tell employees to go home. Good managers can spot when this is needed. But if the employee is telling the manager that everything is fine and isn't showing signs of home stress, I don't blame the manager. > Why should it keep you from becoming VP of engineering? That's messed up. I think most companies are going to value and reward those who put in extra time consistently over those who don't.

tankerdude 11y ago

The role of management is not to get every last drop of work out of you. With the risk of being redundant, management is really about management. You need to recognize when to push them and when not to. From the looks of it, it's push all the time in the team that this person was over at Amazon. That's a failure of management. It costs a lot to train a new employee, and reduces productivity and morale. So managers worth their salt would do one of many things to prevent this type of burnout. Predictability is what management wants as well as employees, believe it or not. If you are an effective manager, you either create predictability and a good work/life balance or you might as well not be there. You're basically a fire fighter in that case, and it doesn't help with long term predictability. Managers who worth their salt will go to bat to get people the time they want/need. If also need to recognize when it is time to walk away, and that's what I tell people when I do interview. If I don't correct the predictability scenario in terms of meeting business needs, I should be fired. If I don't get the tools that I need to get the results, it would be on me to walk away after informing them of the structural problems (and solutions to help them). I suspect that Amazon has a number of people who are purely focused on the bottom line of velocity and don't care about burn out. I'm sure though, that there are good groups to work for at Amazon, but the ratio might be lower than at other tech companies, from what I gather.